I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I think I sprained my soul last night
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
