sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
