you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
