not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
