While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
