I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
