I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
