I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
