YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
