whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
