hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
