hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Randomize
