i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
