Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Randomize
