Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
