another moral hangover. fuck.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
