Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
it was like his penis was on wheels.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
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