is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
