3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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