Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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