her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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