So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
COCAINE IS GR8
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
