She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
