Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(862): View more from New Jersey

The worlds most fuckable chipmunk

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down

(920): View more from Wisconsin

wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?

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(571): View more from Virginia

I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.

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(937): View more from Ohio

just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window

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(+44): View more from England

He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.

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(586): View more from Michigan

just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.

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(904): View more from Florida

I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion

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(847): View more from Illinois

Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.

(630): View more from Illinois

As weird as it sounds I would totally be down

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(573): View more from Missouri

my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.

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