How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
