So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
