so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I don't think brook has ever known best
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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