everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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