She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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