he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
