next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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