Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I need a hoe opinion
go on
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
