This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
A+ Viking dick
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
