I can't breathe out the right side of my face
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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