he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
