i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
