I'm eating all of the evidence.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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