smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
