I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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