I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
