it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
