why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
