...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
