dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
