Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
