just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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