do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
third nipple confirmed
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
