i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
