at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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