Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Randomize
