There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
